Waiting...

Today is the day I find out if I will remain on bedrest or not....and here I am waiting. I figured I would be one of the first calls this morning from the doc's office, apparently my worst fear has occured, they forgot about poor me. It stinks too because I'm one of those people that will not call them because I don't want to seem too antsy, but I think at this point in time it should be understandable.

Bedrest....wow. It sucks. Plain and friggin simple....sucks sucks SUCKS! I even get offended when Dennis doesn't want to lay in bed with me and watch ridiculous shows that I now watch. I really can't blame him, who would want to sit there with me and watch some lame show or a show that makes me cry....and then he has to deal with a lame show and a crying lady who is most likely crying over absolutely nothing.

The crying phenomenon is quite amazing to me still. I remember in my first trimester I cried while watching Celine Dion perform live one night. No I did not intentionally tune the chanel to this but walked in the room and it was on and I was hooked...and then I was crying. I don't even really have a particular liking for Celine Dion, but wow was it powerful!

The "crying phenomenon" has only gotten worse the farther along I am getting. I have decided I can no longer watch "birth day", "deliver me", or "bringing home baby" on TLC or Discovery Health channels. I'm really not too sure why but the only way I can explain it is hopelessness, like wow that is NEVER going to be me because I am going to be pregnant for the REST of my life...very dramatic! I get jealous of these ladies having their babies....it really seems as though I am destined to be pregnant for the rest of my life. Waaa!!

Another show that apparently makes me cry now, which is very confusing is "16 and Pregnant" on MTV. First off, no show on MTV has ever made me cry and I don't even watch MTV or consider it a "real" channel anymore...once music was taken off...MTV was dead to me! So I get bored while being on bedrest and that's on and hell I'm pregnant too so why not watch it. This particular episode the teen parents gave their baby up for adoption and I cried like a damn baby and I'm still not quite sure. Obviously I am not giving up my baby for adoption but it just killed me to watch them do that, all of the motherly bones in my body were screaming at them...although if you think logically (and that's a BIG IF, especially when you're pregnant) then you realize that they are doing a good thing for the baby.

Finally, last night we were watching Deadliest Catch...one of our favorite shows to watch. I bawled my eyes out, yep during a show about killing crab, big ice storms, and being tough and manly! Of course one of them lost a family member while they were out fishing, why'd they have to go and do that? Don't they realize there is a pregnant person watching who just might be a little too emotional right now? Jeeezus people!

I am now going back to the bedroom to lay in bed, find something on TV to watch, and PRAY there is nothing to cry about...hell at this point I can find a reason to cry about anything...even if there is no logical reason to cry.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot I'll be waiting for my nurse to call me too!